Mummydaddy lessons are hotting up and are VERY funny..
Every Wednesday we go and are entertained by the bizarre events that occur when 8 or so couples who DONT have kids come to terms with the practicalities of HAVING one !!

This week I bonded very closely with a lovely plastic baby with slightly sinister eyes. It was either possessed of some mild satanic influence or a heavy bout of wind. I just wasn't sure which. We seemed to get on very well, until I started to get a bit restless and began whacking its head on my leg which I guess probably isn't in the baby books.

We also got to watch the mildest and most sanitised birth video I've ever seen in my life. The potential mummy didn't so muchg as break into a sweat and certainly swear or scream like a banshee. She appeared to have a slight blockage, then her husband looked at her lovingly and kissed her brow tenderly , and then POP ! the baby appeared like the shopkeeper in Mr Benn !!
It was most unconvincing but put everyones worrries at rest, especially as labour complications (mainly things involving scissors and blood) had previously horrified the mummys to be into submission but 10 minutes earlier!

Everythings going very well and 2 jun is still the action date.
Wooohooooo
bring it on!!!!!

My play is now fully written and cast and I start directing it after Easter. If anyone in Manchester or beyond can come it will be 12-13 July at an Arts festival in North Manchester. Let me know and I'll give you details.
Moston Active Drama is the company and there are currently about 13 kids in the show.
Bye for now

Hi all
Baby Mummy's getting bigger and the little Barrettius Sproglet is cooking wonderfully !
One thing that dawned on me yesterday was that as long as he/she is born before 12 June I will get my first Fathers Day where I can actually celebrate and not just trundle into Clintons Cards and ponder for something ACTUALLY funny !
I do hope the card will be personally signed by my child and not just PP'ed by its Mother!

3 June is due date so not too long now. We've got a very cool cot mobile with zebra, giraffe, elephant and slightly creepy gorilla hanging down and it plays a funky tune.
I just can't wait to be able to shop for toys with impunity. Normally I buy lots of toys and get told off for letting them clutter the house up. Now I've got a valid reason to wander round toys R us for hours ! Huzzahhh !!

I found a truly awesome toy the other day
http://www.sigmaautomotive.com/TechieMon/aquaroid.html
this is an incredible robotic jellyfish that you let go in a big tank and it flips and wibbles itself around !! how cool is that!!?
I've got my diving training behind me now so I am fully qualified to drown myself across the world. I can't wait to test what I learned in Egypt somewhere else and discover some wrecks with vast amounts of gold and diamonds on them. Possibly
Anyway off to the Dentist now to pay for some pain and prodding. Hurrah
see ya

Hi all.
Things are hotting up chez Barrett/Treen and we've only got 3 monhts till 2 becomes 3 !! Hurrah
The bump is pretty big now and kicking furiously. I love just lying next to it and chatting to him/her and letting them know we're here. It certainly takes a lot of planning (and buying !) but we're vaguely prepared for it's arrival. It will certainly be well looked after.
Having brought Maisie the dragon up from near birth it can't be that different can it ???
Surely you just chuck them a few crickets and bits of cabbage and they're happy. Is that not right??!!
Keep em warm and change their water and you'll have a happy baby.Easy!

http://www.flaminglips.com
Just a note to demand anyone who hasn't listened to the Flaming Lips and especially their new album 'Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots' I implore you to seek it out and listen to the shimmering multicolour glory of their sound.
the link at the top gives you no excuse not to as you can listen to the whole album for nothing.
Tragically I was unable to go to their gig in town the other week as I was wearing a tuxedo in Birmingham which is another story entirely but they're playing again in March and I WILL be there !!! to
listen and weep with pleasure.
I have some mad live photos I took of them on their last tour which I'll post when I get my scanner to behave again.

Hi all. Things are going fantastically with the baby Barrett. It really will be unleashed on the world very soon and looking at the size of Beccy's belly now it could be any day now - even though its not due for 4 months !!
We've got another scan next friday and we can see if it's go the expected 2 spines. I'm famous at work for having two spines (not just two but spines that rearrange themselves every 6 months into a different arrangement !)
We only saw 1 spine on the first scan but this one is more detailed so hopefully it will show up.

I've been busy working on the play I'm hoping to direct later in the year. I've been working with the kids I'll be directing as they finish their current show off . It's called 'When Dali came to Moston'
and if anyones interested it's on at the Contact Theatre on 6 February. Let me know if you want tickets.

Been doing a lot of painting lately which I've found a lot of fun. I'm very untrained as I didn't really take much notice of Mr Flack and the strange Mrs Woolston; my Art teachers at school but I enjoy it. If my scanner worked I'd scan some in but it doesn't so you'll have to wait till it's mended. I've moved onto oil paints on canvas now but the paint is a bit crap and takes ages to dry !! bugger...

Anyway I'm off to make a curry...

see y'all soon.

Hi all. in the middle of cooking fishcakes and mash so may pop off any minute but how would you know kiddy winkies.........
anyway, everything is going swimmingly. Been doing lots of paintings lately and finding it a lot of fun. I've been commissioned to do and abstract of Kylie's arse which I'm now planning. Should be fun.
The bump is coming on nicely and we're both hugely excited. I've just been blowing raspberries on it which I'm sure it enjoys - what with it being stuck in the dark all day it could do with a bit of stimulation. 3 June is the big due day. It will be shot into the world with a shimmering sparkle and receive all the love it could possibly need. And more.......................................
HURRAH for my baby.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hurrahhhhhhhh!
I'm working on a new play for a kids theatre group which I will direct hopefully in the Summer - developments allowing. Obviously this will be rather a busy year but it's what I want to do and I will succeed at it. Oh yes. Watch this space.
Anyway I'm off to do some more painting now so see y'all soon