Sunday, June 30, 2002

My Plan for the Big Brother house is that they switch the cameras off as soon as the contestants went into the house then the nation quietly pisses itself ,safe in the knowledge that they'll all be inside looning and gurning with their inane histrionics thinking that the country is

A -Watching their every move with voyeurish fascination
B - That we give a toss if they live or die.

Neither of which is true.

When they are finally evicted one by one a taped announcement from Davina (who is actually snorting coke from a midgets left buttock in the Met Bar) comes over the tannoy and they pack their silly little travel case and troop outside to what they expect will be a cavalcade of cheers and whoops but what is actually just an empty compound with maybe a bored cleaning lady sweeping coke cans across the concrete. A Security guard points to the exit and they give them enough money to get the bus back to reality.
This is just an idea. maybe the organisers will be brave enough to try this version of reality tv next year, though I suspect they wont !!!!!!

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